Random thoughts and Ruminations

So, I feel like I have the coolest church in the world. First of all, I love my sista-friends, but I also like the humanity, transparency, and heartfulness that I always feel. You see, I was an outcast most of my time in the church. Oh, I could shine it on -I joined the drill team-but ultimately I always felt exposed as some sort of fraud: the girl who had gay friends, who dyed her hair purple, who listened to rock. Mind you, I was certainly not the only rebel, I was simply the only one wearing it on the outside, the only one taking them seriously when they said, "any questions?"

Very little of what I did could be considered sin. But the alienation turned my face somewhere else. I remained extremely spiritual, always looking for a path I could fit on. But I missed Jesus. I missed him so much. I felt, because of the way the folks at church treated me, that He didn't want me. And that did lead to sinful choices, and feeling cynical and lost for so long.

All of this is to say, that my belief is that a church that would ask folks to cover up tattoos, to take out piercings, to BE SOMEONE ELSE, someone more mainstream, more "like them", is missing the point, and losing folks like me who have such a heart for God, such a desire to be authentic that we don't know how to shake it,
even though we have tried to be more pretentious.
Pretense is not piety!
I have a Savior who knows me, likes me, and wants me.
Not someone else's version of who I am.
And I am thankful!